Sometimes the phone rings and I immediately tense up.
Today was one of those days. My cellphone rang. It rarely rings these days, and most of the time the callers are spam I send straight to voicemail.
Today it was a call that read ‘Cathy Greengrass’ on the display. I am not ashamed to admit I took a deep breath before answering.
We’re not close in the same way other families are close, so it’s pretty rare for calls to occur ‘just because’. There’s almost always some reason for the call (I do it too). The phone shouldn’t be ringing. Travel plans for her to visit in September have already been communicated, and adjustments would be noted via email. It’s not anyone’s birthday this week. I can’t think of anything they’d need to ask me.
That means it’s something they have to tell me.
I immediately thought ‘Which one of them is sick or has died?’. Yes, terrible I know, but we’re all aging at the same pace, and there are less days ahead than behind. We all know that, and it’s been the topic of some previous conversations.
It’s my dad on the line. Ok, so not him thankfully. With his heart issues, he seemed like the most likely. Mom’s tough, and from his tone when he says hello, it’s not her – he’d be shaken in a way you can’t hide.
It’s Austin. My uncle – his brother. He’s died.
My mind went blank. I didn’t know what to say. I still don’t.
Austin wasn’t always the easiest person to be around. He was intense. He was opinionated. At times he could even be a real grouch. He had some valid reasons. He had his share of bad luck. He had several other people’s share too.
This year his life was turning around. He was a short distance from some really heartbreaking unfairness finally getting sorted out. He’d patched up things with his son. He had plans still to execute on.
Now he’s gone.
I hope the end came quietly and without pain. I feel sympathy for his younger children, who’ll grow up without him. I regret we didn’t talk more.
Rest in peace.
Forever don’t seem long enough
Burn your finger playing with fire
But you never know until you try
Come on let’s go there, let’s jump right in
We will rope swing to river swim
Virginia naked in the rain
You make me feel like a kid again
Don’t want to say goodbye to you
Summer always ends too soon
But you never know until you try
Come on let’s go there, let’s jump right in
We will rope swing to river swim
Virginia naked in the rain
You make me feel like a kid again
Don’t want to say goodbye to you
Summer always ends too soon
Whatever you want, I will give you that
Tell me we won’t grow old too fast
Let’s make believe this is gonna last
Forever don’t seem long enough
Forever doesn’t seem long enough
Tell me we won’t grow old too fast
Let’s make believe this is gonna last
Forever don’t seem long enough
Forever doesn’t seem long enough
I will capture your flame
Take a rocket ship to the moon and back
We’ll build castles in the riverbank
Don’t ever grow up too fast
We’ll turn up the music and dance
Yeah, we’ll turn up the music and dance
Take a rocket ship to the moon and back
We’ll build castles in the riverbank
Don’t ever grow up too fast
We’ll turn up the music and dance
Yeah, we’ll turn up the music and dance
Whatever you want, I will give you that
Tell me we won’t grow old too fast
Let’s make believe this is gonna last
Forever doesn’t seem long enough
Forever don’t seem long enough
Forever
Tell me we won’t grow old too fast
Let’s make believe this is gonna last
Forever doesn’t seem long enough
Forever don’t seem long enough
Forever
I will hold you up over my head
Spread your wings and fly through the air
Baby don’t grow up too fast
Let’s turn up the music and dance and dance and dance
Virginia naked in the rain
You make me feel like a kid again
Spread your wings and fly through the air
Baby don’t grow up too fast
Let’s turn up the music and dance and dance and dance
Virginia naked in the rain
You make me feel like a kid again
Whatever you want, I will give you that
Tell me we won’t grow old too fast
Let’s make believe this is gonna last
Forever don’t seem long enough
Tell me we won’t grow old too fast
Let’s make believe this is gonna last
Forever don’t seem long enough
Whatever you want, I will give you that
Tell me we won’t grow old too fast
Let’s make believe this is gonna last
Forever don’t seem long enough
Forever don’t seem long enough
Tell me we won’t grow old too fast
Let’s make believe this is gonna last
Forever don’t seem long enough
Forever don’t seem long enough
I will hold you up over my head
Spread your wings and fly through the air
Don’t grow up too fast
Baby, don’t grow up too fast
Spread your wings and fly through the air
Don’t grow up too fast
Baby, don’t grow up too fast