So the fellow I was so grumpy with got back to me.
He apologized. I was surprised but pleased – doing the hard *things are never fun, but they separate the grownups from the kids.
I thanked him, I’m willing to give him a pass on the next time he’s tense and misdirects.
* I felt this should be ‘is’ instead of ‘are’, but it’s plural and not singular, so I believe it’s correct, even if it doesn’t seem to look that way when I read it.