Month: May 2005

nn

It's been a while since I've written anything here.  Rightly so, I've got someone on my mind, and I'm not often alone with my thoughts, and that's not a bad thing at all.  I've got someone on my mind, someone extremely special to me.

nn

Have you ever been sitting with someone and just KNOWN what they were thinking and feeling?  I'm sure it's happened at least once in your life, if you're someone who talks and listens.  Now picture that happening nearly continuously.  Picture conversations where the words are reversed, and what you'd say is being said to you, and vice versa.

nn

That's what it's like.  People are always looking for the right person.

nn

I've found her.

nn

I'm going to hold on tight.

nn

I'll write more on my vacation, when I'm too far away to call her, and alone 🙁

nn

Gotta dash, 4 more days till my vacation woot!

n

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nn

I just told someone dear to me a deep dark secret.

nn

I didn't realize how much it had hurt me.

nn

My hands are shaking

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nn

Jesus, mary and joseph.

nn

With traditionally IMPECCABLE timing, my ex-wife chose this day of all available days to write me.  This day, after I just got back from visiting a lady so breathtaking and sweet it's actually physically painful to be back home by myself.

nn

I've only read the first line or two, and already I feel sick to my stomach.

nn

I was HAPPY she wasn't writing. 

nn

FUCK.

nn

*deep breath*

nn

K, putting it aside for the moment.  I'm not going to look at it until I'm already in a foul mood, it'll save time.  I just got back from a visit to the states to see C.M.  Needless to say, I honestly can't remember P.A. at all.  Not one bit.  I was too busy looking at her, and vice versa.

nn

We've been talking for a while now, but this was our first “date”.  I've never had a day pass so quickly!

nn

There's much more I could say, but there's no need.  The important things really were just for her ears, and the trivial things will wait until another time.

nn

Oh, just for the record though, she's PERFECT.

nn

🙂

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n

I'm tired, and a little hungry.nnThat's probably why my spirits have sunk to a new low.  It tends to happen whenever my energy levels take a nosedive, and all I can do is wait and ride it out.nnI don't want to talk any more right now

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nn

I'm sleepy.

nn

It's been a long week already.  Panic and mayhem intermixed with many great accomplishments.  I have to admit, I really wish it was the weekend, I'd love to take a day, turn off my cellphone, and NOT check my email (wouldn't that be unusual) and just go out and wander through town with a backpack and an ipod, and just forget about work for a little.

nn

I've got a project due june 1.  Lucky me, I'm on vacation on the 27th.  So 23 days.  No sweat right?  Umm.. I haven't read the product spec, and I'm not exactly sure what my part is.  If I take weekends off, 17 days.  Just over two weeks to design, develop, implement and test my section of this product.  That's going to be a little crazy I think.  Luckily my trainees are turning out well, so I've been able to offload quite a bit of work onto them, which has given me just enough time to work on the support work I'm also doing.  Still not making any headway on the project yet, but it looks like I'll be able to afford it a little bit of the time it deserves starting tomorrow, I'm just not enthusiastic enough tonight to jump back into the fray.

nn

I've been chatting with someone new recently, and I must admit it's keeping me quite interested.  I'm not going to say much more than that for the moment, lets leave that world processing, and come back to it one day in the future.

nn

I still haven't heard from my cousin A, I don't think she's doing well, but she was getting help the last time I heard anything about her, and I'm crossing my fingers.  I'm planning on stopping in to see her when I hit nelson at the end of the month.

nn

I'm quitting smoking again I think.  It's … a hassle.  I mean don't get me wrong, it gets me out of the office at intervals, and that's probably healthy for all concerned, but I was doing fine with just 1 cigarette during a working day, and now I'm not.  That doesn't work for me.  So I'm on my last pack, and I'll likely pick up some patches on the way tomorrow, and give away any smokes I have left at that point.  It's not like it's really hard to quit anyway, it's a couple days patched up, then done.

nn

Personally I couldn't believe how easy it was the last time I quit.  I thought it would be harder, but I guess it gets easier every time you quit.  I only really started again as a reaction to the stresses I was going through, and I think I can do without it now.

nn

I finished my car repairs, and everything seems to be running well.  It cost a bit more than I'd planned on, but I was still able to cover it without any real hassle.  Car insurance is coming in the middle of the month, but luckily I get paid the day before, so it shouldn't be an issue.  Too bad I don't get paid before my vacation, but direct deposit is a truly wonderful thing, and I have enough space on my credit card to do the whole vacation without any issues.  Not that I would mind you, but it's nice to know it would be possible.

nn

My part in THE big project is nearly done, and I've earned some respect for the work I've done.  Personally I don't think I did anything too special, but I'm quite pleased that people are happy with the work I've done.  It's funny, it's easy for me, so I don't really see what the big deal is.  Maybe everything in life is like that?

nn

I'm going to run, there's so much more that's happened and that's going on, but I'm out of time for the moment.

nn

Cya!

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